https://sites.google.com/view/ghoststories/home
Ghost Stories
Source: Wikimedia Commons
Storybook Plan:
For my story I will be the main storyteller. I may tell each story from the point-of-view as the person who experiences the ghost, and then towards the end of each story I could explain it from my point. I want each of the stories to connect in some way, and towards the end it will all make sense to the reader. I hope to offer the readers a suspenseful and interesting story that influences them to read more. The three stories I have chosen so far are from the Sacred Texts website. They are titled The Lady with the Lantern, the first story from Ghost-Laying Stories, and The Roaring Bull O' Bagbury. The stories come from English Fairy and Other Folk Tales by Edwin Sidney Hartland.
Hi Mckenna, wow, I absolutely love your photo for the banner. The picture is absolutely breathtaking. I am really curious to find out if it was a suicide or murder. I loveee mysteries, especially murder mysteries! I like how you are speaking in first person because you are able to give so much more detail speaking in first person. I hope you continue to use that point of view to tell all of your stories. I would love to hear the emotion and feelings that the main character goes through while finding out about the history of the house. It would also be great if you used dialogue with other characters too throughout your stories. I wonder if the stories will include a part where the main character goes around to look for stories from other people who have witnessed things that went on in the house or if you found someone that had previously lived in the house but quickly left.
ReplyDeleteHi Mckenna! I love mystery stories and you did an awesome job of leaving us wondering what was going to happen next in the story. I think it would be helpful if you broke up the story into more paragraphs just to help the reader follow along. I am not sure of the direction you are wanting to go in but it would be cool to go into more detail about the stories and information that was found about the house. I think adding more dialogue about the conversations they have about the haunted house would help the reader visualize what was actually happening. Overall though you did a really great job!
ReplyDeleteHi Mckenna!
ReplyDeleteI liked the introduction to your story and I'm really looking forward to the rest of your storybook. I love ghost stories, and I considered going that direction with my own storybook. However, I didn't feel confident in my ability to create that eerie atmosphere that's so necessary for a good spooky story. I feel like you have made and excellent start. I could feel the creepiness of the house that you were trying to portray. The pictures that you have chosen for your site are really beautiful. The banner picture has a sort of stark feel to it that I think sets the tone really well. The house picture is also lovely, although it looks a little grainy. I'm having the same problem with one of my pictures. I really want to keep it, because it's perfect, so I'm trying to find a better resolution version of it. Really good job, I can't wait to read the rest!
Hi McKenna!
ReplyDeleteWow, first off, I really liked the way you introduce your storybook. You give such a detailed background, and I think this is something I am trying to fix on my own storybook. So, this is a great example of a really well written, and strong introduction. I was a little confused regarding the front coverage with the title "The Beginning". What is the significance behind this? I really am curious! Also, if you want maybe a sharper image for your introduction page, I might suggest looking up a country house picture on flickr! It won't be clipart, maybe. But, it will be a sharper image if this is something you were struggling with at first. However, overall, I think you did a super job at creating your layout and introduction to your story. I am looking forward to revisiting your storybook to see the new additions you make! Awesome job!
Hi McKenna! I decided to read your story because I'm also writing about ghosts for my storybook this semester. I really enjoy the first person narration you've chosen — you've really mastered the conversational tone for it! Reading it, I can hear someone sharing the story with a friend. I think as you continue writing your stories, it'll be really cool to hear more detailed versions of the haunted happenings that happen in this house. One thing you might consider is using shorter paragraphs or more dialogue in your introduction to help move the reader through the story more easily. In terms of the design of the Introduction page, you might consider using a banner image at the top of the page or using a darker theme to set a spooky tone for the story. The photo of the house is a little blurry, so if you found a sharper one, that might be nice for the reader as well! Good job, I look forward to reading more!
ReplyDeleteHi McKenna, The introduction you provided was a great segway into your story. It helped set the scene for what your topic is about. I liked your storybook topic a lot. Ghost stories sounds like a very interesting topic to use for your book. The style of your writing is excellent and made the story very enjoyable. I like how you organized the story by the months that the events occurred. I like how simple the page looks, but it might help to spice it up a little with images of ghosts or creepy scenes. The detail you provided about the haunting of the house made the story seem so real to me. Great story! look forward to reading more!
ReplyDeleteMcKenna, I will start with a comment on your website. I like the way you designed it and the pictures gave off the right vibe for what you were going for. As for your introduction and story, I thoroughly enjoyed reading them. I really like how you are telling it from your own perspective. I am also a huge fan of how you made it seem like a classic ghost story where murders and other acts have occurred in a house so that the locals are concerned of the oblivious family that moves in. I am curious to find out if you are basing your story off of the Amityville Horror? What if the reason your dad does not want to leave the house is because he is possessed by a spirit in the house? I feel as though this would make the whole storybook scarier and more interesting for readers.
ReplyDeleteMcKenna,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoy your layout for your project. The darkness and black and white contrast as perfect for your theme of 'Ghost Stories.' This was one of the topics of focus that I looked at doing, but did not end up being able to focus on just one theme. So, I am very interested in your project and jealous that you are actually completing something that I wanted to do! I would maybe do something different on your home page. Maybe give some more information on what your project is about on this page. I know this is what you are supposed to do on your introduction, but I think it would be awesome to add a few sentences from your introduction to the home page to give a teaser. Your story the Harper Family is incredible! I love the dates and almost diary-like feel that it has. It is a great tactic to use for a ghost story. However, I did find the author's note slightly confusing in relation to your story and the changes that you made. I would also like to see the structure of this story edited to look more uniform. The diary and date structure was not as uniform as it could be. This structure also kind of snuck up on me because of the way the format was. Overall, your project is off to an amazing start and I look forward to seeing more of it in the future!
Hi McKenna!
ReplyDeleteYour introduction to your final blog project is wonderful. You do a wonderful job of setting up the background for your story while also peaking the reader’s interest. The post sounds like you were writing about what made you interested in writing about this topic. This makes it very fun to read for the reader. I only wish you would have saved the story of the teenagers finding Mrs.Hudson's body for a story book in this collection. You could still even write about that later.
Your first story, Harper Family, your first two paragraphs seem to switch the way they are written. It sounds were when reading. I would suggest refining this portion. The way your story is set up as a diary makes it were to see a post labeled “Present Day”. Could you possibly update this in a way that makes it follow and easy to understand? Overall you did a really good job. I look forward to reading the rest of this.
McKenna,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed your introduction and first story! Regarding the story about the Harper family, I really like how you spaced out the dates on the journal entries. This made it seem very realistic, and contributed to the idea that a lot had happened in between different journal entries. In this story, you use Denny’s personal journal to give information about the haunted house. I like this approach because it provides a unique and intimate perspective. I wonder if giving a little bit more information about Denny and his background might add some depth to this story! You could do this through introducing some more information in his introduction, or even by expanding some of the journal entries. This might add an emotional component if we learn more about his life, since the problems with the house would affect a character that the audience has become close to!
In addition to that, I think that you could really use some images to your advantage here. The images that you have used so far in the introduction and in the story of the Harper family are awesome, and I think if you incorporated some more, especially spaced throughout the story on both of these pages, then the stories would be even more aesthetically appealing to your readers!
I like the idea of the haunted house, so keep up the great work!
Hi McKenna,
ReplyDeleteIt seems like your are off to an awesome start to your project. This is probably the coolest page I have been on in this class so far. Yours is totally different from any that I have come across so far, and it is nice to see a different style and theme of writing. Your project reminds me of the American Horror Stories tv series, is this where you got the idea? Anyways, I really enjoyed reading this webpage. The Harper family story was a really fun read. I like how you spaced the story out to dates and I am sure all of the other readers enjoyed it too because it was really cool. Overall, great start to your project. I am looking forward to coming back to your page later and reading more stories in the future.
Brooks
Hey, McKenna! I really like the concept of your storybook. Telling the stories of families who have lived in the same haunted house is a fantastic idea. It reminds me of movies like Amityville Horror series. The format of your first story, "Harper Family" is great. Having it written like a journal is a wonderful way to do something other than the standard narrative style. I loved the style and it is well written, I just wish we had more background on the journaler, Denny. As for your second story, "Ashford Family," the style is also a very cool choice. It reads like an interview in the numerous horror movies that are "based on real events." My only real suggestion - and this could be for the storybook as a whole - would be to proofread several times. It's not really the biggest deal but I spotted a few minor punctuation and grammar mistakes. We all do it, commas are my enemy. Other than those few minor suggestions, well done!
ReplyDeleteHello, McKenna! Great introduction into your storybook! I really appreciated the first person narrative for the description of the haunted house in your introduction. Also, the banner picture on your introduction page is very spooky and does a great job of setting an eerie tone for the rest of the stories.
ReplyDeleteSo as I was reading through the introduction and the stories I had a few questions come to mind.
For introduction you did a phenomenal job of explaining the history of the house! I will say that as I was reading the order of the paragraphs was a bit confusing. What is the name of the narrator? Is he/she doing research after his or her own haunting occurrences? If so, what if the person speaking introduces him/herself, then explains the odd occurrences, and then decides to do research, and then describes the house and its' history. This could possibly make the introduction have more fluid transitions and give the reader a more clear insight into the timing of the stories and the narrator's experiences.
Great work so far!
Mckenna,
ReplyDeleteLet me tell you that your Storybook actually gave me CHILLS. I don’t know if you actually believe in ghosts, but I love reading about people’s “encounters” with them. This is actually a really good topic. Your introduction was good, but I was almost unaware of who the actual narrator was going to be until I read the comment under your Comment Wall’s blog picture. I would like different header pictures, to get me in the mood or give me a better idea of what the story is going to be about once I pick which one to read. With your actual stories, I would like more dialogue (I know ghosts probably don’t talk, but the people experiencing the ghosts would probably be talking, right? Maybe even cursing because they’re very scared). Elongating the stories would provide more of a chance for you to provide details of the house, characters, setting, etc. I am looking forward to more stories from you!
Hi Mckenna! I just finished reading through what is on your storybook collection for the commenting assignment this week and I really enjoyed it! Your pictures worked together well with your stories and your overall topic was interesting and unique! Something you could do to improve it slightly is to add a little detailing about who the narrator is because I was a little bit confused by that. I also think you could lengthen your actual stories of the families that you have so far to add room for greater detail to be given. That way, people can relate more to the characters that you have developed for your work. Overall, though, I think you have done a really great job developing your collection and it is one that will grab people's attention. I can't wait to see what you do next!
ReplyDeleteHi McKenna,
ReplyDeleteThe setup of your storybook is awesome, it gives a spooky vibe that really helps with the stories. I read your introduction, which was spooky and really interesting. I did not see ant grammar mistakes or anything major out of place so keep it up! Maybe adding a spooky picture of the house would be great to add on extra spookiness to the story. I was also a little confused on who the narrator was for the introduction, it seemed like there were multiple so maybe adding more details of even dialogues will help get rid of the confusion. I like that you made the first story almost like a diary. It was really unique. Maybe add more things to the first story as it did seem a little short to me. Overall, your story book looks like it's going in the right direction. Good luck with rest to it and I can't wait to read more.
I originally wanted to write a scary storybook, but just doing research for ideas was killing me. I guess I’m more of a scaredy cat than I thought. The introduction got my attention for sure. I like that the second story is told through journal entries. It creates a more personal story and gives a reader more insight into the character’s thoughts and feelings. I also like that the Harper family got out. In a lot of ghost stories, the family gets a clear message from the ghost that it doesn’t want them there, but they stay anyways. I don’t care how much money they’ve got invested in the house. Get the heck out of there! You were very creative with the different ways that your protagonist gets information from past owners/explorers. Each of the stories were very spooky, and exciting. The only piece of advice I can offer would be to maybe move your images up into your stories. They’re not as noticeable at the end. Thanks so much for sharing!
ReplyDeleteHi McKenna!
ReplyDeleteI really like the variety in format of these stories! It was a really great idea to have the first one be in a journal entry form! In this comment I’ll be focusing on the third story, because that one was my favorite! I liked that it was told through the eyes of someone reading about another person’s encounter with the ghost. The changes you made to the plot were good ones and I think it really enhanced your story. What happens next? Is your main character going to visit the house themselves, or will they continue with their research to help lay the ghost to rest? It could be interesting to add a little bit of that to the end, just to setup the next installment in your story book. I’m really excited to read what you write next and how you wrap all of this up!
Hi Mckenna,
ReplyDeleteI love the idea of your storybook! I wanted to do a spooky ghost story, storybook originally but it did not work out. I love how you have given a different layout to each of your stories. It makes it much more interesting to read. You did a great job with intro to set up the rest of your story book and I was so excited to start reading all your stories after I read that. I, like other people, did get confused sometimes on who was telling the stories, so that would be something good to work on. But your layout and pictures are all really great. Keep up the great work and keep on writing11
Hey Mckenna!
ReplyDeleteI am from the other class and I chose your project to give feedback on. I was drawn to yours because of the title. I really like stories that are scary or supernatural so I was excited to get going on yours. Right off the bat, I loved your picture on your homepage. I didn’t even have to read any of the stories to know it was going to fit perfectly. As for the stories themselves, wow! I loved reading every single one. They were so mysterious and spooky. I was definitely into them the entire time! I don’t know if you purposefully chose pictures that were a little blurry for some of your photos. I can understand if you did because they are supposed to be from a long time ago. I thought that you could maybe add another picture in your banner alongside the ones you already have. If you do that, your readers will have an idea of what to visualize as they are reading instead of waiting until they get to the end of your story to see a picture. But, GREAT JOB!
Mckenna holy cow this set up is awesome! Your stories are all so engaging! Your introduction did a fantastic job of setting the scene for your 3 stories! I am so glad I finally found this project at the end of the semester! These stories are very creative I like how you used England Folklore in your first story to develop your own! I can totally see these stories being made into a scary movie your plot is so well developed! Very excellent job! I think my favorite family story was the Lawson family. I enjoyed reading Ben's journal entries on his encounters of ghosts. This was very thought out and I am very impressed! Well done!
ReplyDeleteHello Mckenna! I am from the Epics of India class and I finished commenting on my classes projects. I decided to check your project page out and I am so happy I did! I really enjoyed reading a few of your topic brain storms. I would like to specifically talk about your topic brainstorm from September 3rd, I am a huge fan of the Little mermaid and it would have been cool to base your project off of that theme. I did mine based on Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I think that you doing a topic brain storm was very beneficial for your project. Now that I look back on the semester I think I should have done more "Topic Brainstorms". Great job!
ReplyDeleteHi Mckenna,
ReplyDeleteI greatly enjoyed your storybook and can't wait for you to finish it up! Your writing style is very intriguing, I was on the edge of my seat the entire time! I like how you incorporate other stories so seamlessly into your own narrative! It's working out really well for you! I'm not very familiar with the term "lay the ghost" so if you could offer a little more explanation on that, that would be great! I know this is mostly about the Harper family but I feel like we float too much and we're not really grounded in the narrator. We know she's a she and a little bit about her family but not much else. I'm not sure how much of that you potentially would want to incorporate.. it's just an observation really.
I think you picked really interesting stories to base your storybook off of and your author's notes are great at explaining the background behind each one! I also appreciate the layout and color scheme of your website! It is appropriately spooky!
Good luck with finals!
Hi Mckenna!
ReplyDeleteWow, your storybook did not end at all how I was expecting! It was quite a shock to find out the the narrator was accidentally killed by her own dad. I think that you did a really good job, and there was a nice cohesiveness to how you mixed all the different stories together and made them your own. I also really liked the open endedness of the storybook, as though the tale isn't over, just that chapter of it. I think you did a really good job, and I very much enjoyed reading it!